My name is Jessie Kimberly. I am 24 years old. I am a child of the most high God. I am a wife. I am an occupational therapist. I am about to become a mother. As the last sentence states my husband, Joel, and I are about to start a new and exciting phase of life. I am 38.5 weeks pregnant with our first son, James (Jimmy) Matthew Kimberly. We are overjoyed about our new addition. God is very good to us and we have been very blessed.
In fact, I feel as if overall my life has just been easy for quite some time. My last major life struggle was when I applied to my graduate program for OT. It was very competitive. I was originally waitlisted, and the process really grew me. It pushed me closer to the Lord than I had ever been. I was reading Francis Chan's book, Crazy Love, during that time and I was really learning what it felt like to have a Crazy Love for Christ. It was a hard time, but I was being pushed and refined. I think that the hardest part of that time was the fact that I knew exactly what I wanted, but after applying and interviewing, I had absolutely no control over whether my plan would be successful. This helped me to rely on the Lord and have faith that whatever happened would be his will and for my good regardless of the outcome. I was blessed with getting in that year, but I was willing to accept whatever happened. I was at peace.
I just have not had a situation like this for four years. Since that time I have gotten married, finished school, passed my board exam, and was hired on at my first job. There were plenty of stressful times in between, but overall I had a significant amount of control. School was not always easy, but I had the control over how much I studied. Taking my board was stressful, but again, I had a solid study plan and went into it feeling fairly good. I had a job set up prior to taking my board. I have also had a wonderful and easy first 2 years of marriage. I have a wonderful husband and he has made these first years incredible! We are now getting ready for our first child, which has had its difficulties, but overall has been a joyful experience.
I have definitely grown in my walk with the Lord through this time, but I have not been pushed. I am finishing up a women's ministry study on being a Mary in a Martha world referring primarily to Luke 10:38-42. Martha was busy in the kitchen while Mary simply sat at Christ's feet and soaked in what he had to say. What I have learned through the study is that kitchen service IS important, but work needs to be in conjuncture with intimacy with God. I enjoy the work aspect of things. My husband and I serve in junior high student ministries, we are both leaders in mens/women's ministries, and we serve in children's ministry 2xs per month for 3rd grade. We like service, but what I realized that I was lacking in intimacy with God. I enjoy being in his word daily, but my prayer life has a lot of room for growth, and I often serve out of routine rather than out of love for the Lord. I have been a Martha.
Now we are approaching a time that will have challenges, will not always be easy, but will grow me. My husband works for Chick-Fil-A and in July he will be applying for an Interim Manager program in hopes of one day becoming an owner/operator of his own store. We are heading into a time where we will want something with all of our hearts, but will have no control over the outcome. While I think that my husband will make an incredible owner/operator, I am not the one that will decide on whether or not he gets accepted into the program or gets his own store down the road.
I am currently reading Galatians and Paul is talking to the church about walking in faith and the freedom from Christ rather than trying to blend the law with the Gospel. This has really hit me, because faith is not something that we as believers are able to have for salvation and then walk by works on our own accord. Faith is something that we have to choose to walk in daily. It needs to be apart of everything we do.
Now is a time that I need to decide to walk in faith, know that God is sovereign, rejoice in the fact that his plans are always better than mine, and as a result grow in intimacy with Christ. My anxieties and worries are not gone. They are just something that I am going to have to take captive daily and decide to trust the Lord instead. It is not going to be an easy time, but I cannot express in words how excited I am to see what God is going to do inside of me. It is such a blessing to have to rely on God. While I love having control over everything and life being easy is fantastic, nothing is better than closeness and intimacy with the Lord. So as our family grows and we prayerfully go down this new road, I am choosing to be a Mary. I am choosing to sit at Jesus's feet and give him complete control. I do not know where life will lead, but I am choosing to walk by faith and not by sight.
Walk by Faith
